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#374 Where Eagles Dare

Watched: November 15 2025

Director: Brian G. Hutton

Starring: Richard Burton, Clint Eastwood, Mary Ure, Patrick Wymark, Michael Hordern, Donald Houston, Peter Barkworth, William Squire, Robert Beatty, Brook Williams, Derren Nesbitt, Ingrid Pitt

Year: 1968

Runtime: 2h 38min

High in the Bavarian mountains, an American Brigadier General is being held by the Nazis as a POW. A team of British MI6 agents is formed and tasked with rescuing him before he spills important secrets. Led by Major Smith (Burton), they are joined by (smoldering) American Army Ranger Schaffer (Eastwood) and dropped off in the mountains from midair disguised as German soldiers.

“Ok, boys! Let’s practice. Repeat after me: ‘Hallo. Guten morgen. Bitte. Danke. Ich heiße. Auf wiedersehen. Ich möchte ein Bier. Tschüss.’ You got that? Great! Then I think we’re all ready. This should go smoothly.”

Now, you may think that this will be a straight forward let’s-break-into-the-castle-and-get-our-guy-and-go-home-again-lads kind of a story. But you would be mistaken. There are traitors and secrets and twists and turns galore! Double and triple crossings. Spies and lovers and friendships. And explosions. So. Many. Explosions.

Impressively, they managed to throw in a couple of competent and bad ass female characters as well. We approve.

Because of the many twists and turns, we don’t want to spoil anything by giving away too much of the plot. We’ll just urge you to watch this, because it is amazing. We have mentioned that we have been very pleasantly surprised by the westerns we’ve watched for the list, and the same goes for a lot of the war movies (those are six different links, btw. Don’t say we never do anything for you). This is not the first genre we’re instinctly drawn to (even though we grew up with a father who watched a lot of war movies and who also read the books they were based on), but we find ourselves enjoying them immensely.

Then again, any movie with an action sequence set on a cable car is bound to be a winner.

Where Eagles Dare is fun, exciting, entertaining and intricate, and also extremely stressful. It also features the most Gestapo guy that ever Gestapoed (Gestapod? Gestaped..?).

He’s giving 98% Gestapo with just a touch of Nigel from Top Secret (1984)

Both Burton and Eastwood are fantastic, as are the rest of the cast, but one could argue that the real star of the movie is Explosions™. Everything explodes. Did you know that German cars in the 1940s had built in explosives that went off randomly if they bumped into something? Or if they went down a steep hill? Or if the tyres stopped touching the ground for two seconds? Or if someone looked at it funny? We didn’t either until we watched Where Eagles Dare. Why they made them like that, we don’t know. Then again, we question a lot of choices made in Germany around that time, so this might have followed some inexplicable logic understood only by fascists.

Believe it or not, this is just a normal German car that was caught in a mild gust of wind. Our leading theory is that the cars were actually built by political prisoners who did what they could to defeat the third reich. Well done!

In addition to the frequently exploding cars, our heroes have brought enough dynamite to take down all of Bavaria, and they are not afraid to use it. There’s not a situation they face that can’t be improved with an explosion or two.

Although sometimes they use guns, just to mix it up a bit. It’s important not to become complacent.

We loved the actors, the characters, the many twists and turns, the balls-to-the-walls action, the gorgeous matte paintings, the sets, the stunts, the clearly ’60s hair and make-up, the cable car and all the burning cars. Not to mention the fact that Clint Eastwood, who looks about as American as it is possible to look, tries to pass for a German soldier. Now, it’s hard to pinpoint exactly what an “American” is supposed to look like, but he is it. You could look at that man completely out of any context, and 99% of people would go “Hey, look at that American guy!” (Then, most of them would add “He’s ridiculously handsome!” Especially if he smoldered at them.)

Pictured: obviously NOT a German

What we learned: Old timey movie kisses look incredibly uncomfortable. Also, Clint Eastwood is smolder incarnate.

MVP: Dynamite. And Clint Eastwood’s smolder.

Next time: Wild in the Streets (1968)

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#372 The Swimmer

Watched: November 4 2025

Director: Frank Perry, Sydney Pollack

Starring: Burt Lancaster, Janet Landgard, Janice Rule, Marge Champion, Joan Rivers, Nancy Cushman, House Jameson, Tony Bickley

Year: 1968

Runtime: 1h 35min

Welcome to the surreal world of The Swimmer. You’re in for quite a ride… Ned Merrill (Lancaster) is running around in his bathing suit in a gorgeous woodland, as people do. He drops by some old friends’ backyard and goes for a swim in their pool. The friends are hungover from the night before, and have not seen Ned for aaaaages. But they love him, and he’s such a great guy. While reminiscing with them, Ned has the brilliant idea to swim all the way home, by way of his neighbours’ pools which form a “river” the entire way. Off he goes!

But not without a drink in his hand. He’s not an animal.

As he makes his wet way towards his house he meets several old friends and acquaintances, but the vibe changes discernibly as he gets closer and closer to home. In the beginning, all the people he meets are old friends who clearly see him as a good guy, although they all get a bit weird whenever his wife or daughters are brought up. But as he gets closer to home, the people he encounters are increasingly hostile and keep hinting more and more to something that clearly has gone wrong in Ned’s life. Our “hero” also goes super sleazy with Julie (Landgard), a young girl who used to babysit for his kids. Things get gradually darker and weirder until he finally reaches “home.”

It starts off so innocently. Even bringing along his very young former babysitter seems wholesome at first. Until it’s not…

We had no idea what we were getting ourselves into, but we were hooked from the start. We loved how our view of Ned changed throughout the movie – from seeming to be a nice enough man (and just a little bit inappropriate with all the women he knew) in the beginning, to a creepy, cheating, horrible narcissist at the end.

This scene with his former mistress is the best depiction we’ve seen of a man completely unravelling when he finds out a woman has faked her orgasms. Actual quote: “You loved it. You loved it. We both loved it. YOU LOVED IT!” And she’s just there like “Sure, Jan.”

The Swimmer kept us questioning throughout, and we came up with about 271 theories on what was actually going on. What happened to his daughters? His wife? Is this a sort of “life flashing before his eyes” scenario? Are we in purgatory? Is he senile? Is this a portrayal of his gradual corruption and entitlement throughout his life told through a swimming pool voyage? ‘Twas a mystery wrapped in an enigma. In the end, things start coming together and some questions are answered, but we’re still not 100% sure what exactly we just watched. That being said, we loved it (actually loved it. It wasn’t just a man telling us we did).

Another bit of unravelling: at the first pools people find him quirky and charming for going around in his swim trunks at a clothed event. As he progresses, not so much…

Among our favourite things were the ’60s parties he kept crashing (such a vibe!), the Hallorans, the way we liked Ned less and less as we went along, his increasingly fragile ego and psyche, and the many mysteries hidden in the plot. Also, the beautiful scenery added to the film’s dreamlike quality which, granted, gradually descended into a nightmare. Watch it!

Preferably through a closed, rusted fence with an anguished look on your face as you gradually realise the reality of your existence and slowly descend into madness and despair. It’s what we did.

What we learned: Dude! No means NO!!!

MVP: The pools. Or, possibly, the narrative technique. Or Ned’s fragile male ego.

Next time: The Thomas Crown Affair (1968)

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#369 The Boston Strangler

Watched: October 11 2025

Director: Richard Fleischer

Starring: Tony Curtis, Henry Fonda, George Kennedy, Mike Kellin, Hurd Hatfield, Carolyn Conwell, William Marshall

Year: 1968

Runtime: 1h 56min

From 1962 to 1964, Boston was terrorized by a serial killer who raped and murdered women, dubbed “the Boston Strangler”. Albert DeSalvo confessed to the crimes in 1965 and only three years later The Boston Strangler was released, detailing the crimes and the investigation. While this could have been a sensationalized and exploitative movie trying ot cash in on horrific events, it luckily comes across as a respectful and very accurate portrayal of a horrible case of serial murder.

It’s still gruesome – don’t get us wrong. Just not overly salacious.

Right from the start, this drew us in. We loved the different angles/framing/multiple images (whatever we should call it – if you’ve seen the film you understand what we mean) used throughout the film. The first part of the movie depicts the investigation, and we really enjoyed having the focus on the investigators rather than the culprit – let’s highlight the heroes, not the monsters! We appreciated that the sexual violence suffered by the victims was only implied rather than explicitly shown. Fleischer manages to convey the horrific nature of the crimes without sexualizing the scenes, which is something more filmmakers should attempt at times…

This is what we mean by the whole different angles/framing/multiple image-thingy we mentioned. No idea what it’s called, but we loved it!

The main investigator, Phil DiNatale, is played by George Kennedy, which we have to admit took some getting used to. We found ourselves waiting for lieutenant Frank Drebin to come along and (hilariously) solve the crime… Instead, he is joined by John Bottomly (Fonda), the newly appointed head of the Strangler task force. It’s always beautiful to see when different branches of law inforcement manage to coordinate their efforts and come together to solve a case.

One might even say they formed some sort of… Police Squad!
…we’ll see ourselves out.

And effort was definitely made! We loved seeing a bunch of creeps being arrested and/or interrogated for doing creepy stuff. Now, we don’t mean to kink shame – you do you, boo – but once you make your kinks someone else’s problem without their consent, you deserve to be made (at least) as uncomfortable as the ones you drag into your sexual fantasies.

Although questioning a man for murder simply for owning the collected works of the Marquis de Sade might be overstepping a bit… Who doesn’t have that on their bookshelf?

Eventually, the POV switches from the investigation to the killer himself. We are brought along as DeSalvo (Curtis) tricks his way into women’s apartments where he sexually assaults and strangles them. But we also get to see his family life, as he was married and had young children at home. Finally, the last part of the movie is focused on his confession and his mental state.

His seemingly normal and happy family life somehow makes the crimes even more unsettling… (Also, side note, his wife looks like Liv Ullmann… Well, Carolyn Conwell, the actress, did at least.)

There’s so much here we loved. Visually, it’s very stylish and cool, and we feel it tells the story without exploiting the victims too much. The Boston Strangler has no score and the silence works really well. It’s also extremely quotable, and we enjoyed the critique of the inherent violence in U.S. society. The pacing is a bit uneven, and the last act felt a bit long and is less engaging than the first part. Still, the final reenactment by DeSalvo/Curtis is very chilling and an unnerving end to an excellent movie.

Turns out making him take a long hard look in the mirror actually had the desired effect. Have we tried this in other interrogations..? Like, really tried it? Has this solution been staring us in the (mirror image of our) face all this time?

Ok, we know this is dodgy, but we love serial killer stories… What can we say – we’re white women, it’s our culture. So we know quite a lot about this case, and as far as we can remember The Boston Strangler is a very accurate depiction of events. There has been a lot of speculation about DeSalvo’s guilt though. Part of his confession contains details that he would be unlikely to know unless he was there, but other in other parts he gets very basic things wrong. However, a few years ago DNA evidence proved his involvement in at least one of the rapes and murders, so he was certainly not entirely innocent. The question remains though – was he the only strangler? Or were there several killers stalking the women of Boston? We may never know for certain.

We only know that thirteen women between the ages of 19 and 85 were sexually assaulted and brutally murdered, possibly by the same perpetrator…

What we learned: As fascinating as we admittedly find them, serial killers are pretty much pathetic in real life…

MVP: Probably Edward W. Brooke (Marshall). Assembling a task force is never wrong. Shoutout to DiNatale and Bottomly as well though!

Next time: The Devil Rides Out (1968)

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#368 Spirits of the Dead/Histoires extraordinaires

Watched: October 7 2025

Director: Federico Fellini, Louis Malle, Roger Vadim

Starring: Jane Fonda, Brigitte Bardot, Alain Delon, Terence Stamp, Peter Fonda

Year: 1968

Runtime: 2h 1min

Spooctober continues (we expand it into November as well. And occasionally December. Not to mention January! There’s nothing scarier than a blank slate and new opportunities, after all…), and coincidentally there are quite a few fitting films coming up on the list. Such timing! In Spirits of the Dead, three directors have each made a short film based on the works of our child- and adulthood hero Edgar Allan Poe. Artistic liberties have been taken, but in each entry Poe’s spirit is present. And he is in fact dead. So the (English) title checks.

We like to think his spirit still roams wild on Hampstead Heath. Close to the meat.

Director Roger Vadim is behind the first segment, “Metzengerstein.” Here, cruel, oversexed countess Frédérique de Metzengerstein (Fonda) falls for her cousin/enemy/rival/neighbour Wilhelm Berlifitzing (also Fonda, but this time Peter), burns down his stables when he rejects her, then grows obsessed with a horse that appears out of nowhere just as Wilhelm accidentally dies in the fire. Well, technically the horse seems to appear out of a tapestry. Either way, clearly a supernatural horse. It does not end well for her.

There’s a joke in here somewhere about stallions and getting wet, but we’re better than that.

The second adaptation, Louis Malle’s “William Wilson,” follows the titular character (Delon) as he is confronted by kindness and positive qualities, things he himself does not possess in the slightest. As he goes around bullying and torturing school mates, trying to start a serial killer career by dissecting a random (and still alive) woman he picked up from the street (with a willing audience of equally psychotic medical students, it seems? WTF, guys???), and cheating at cards (ok, this one sounds relatively mild compared to the others, but he does it in order to strip and whip a woman (Bardot) in front of yet ANOTHER audience of men before offering her up for them to rape. So the cheating really was just a means to an end), he is repeatedly thwarted by a doppelganger (or the Jekyll to his Hyde, if you will). And Wilson is pretty darned indignant about it! It does not end well for him.

We see you, guys in the background who just stand by. You’re all equally culpable.

The final, and in our opinion best, entry is Fellini’s “Toby Dammit,” based on the story “Never Bet the Devil Your Head.” Now, while it might be the segment that diverges the most from the story on which it is based (it is also the only one where they did not keep the title or the historical setting), it is also the most successful (in our opinion). Toby (Stamp) is a messed up, alcoholic actor visiting Italy to star in a Catholic western and drive a Ferrari, who keeps seeing the devil everywhere. This devil is in the form of a little girl with a ball as opposed to Poe’s old man with just a girly hairstyle (actual quote: “his hair was parted in front like a girl’s”). Toby’s behaviour becomes increasingly unhinged as he falls deeper into the bottle as well as his own visions, climaxing in a wild Ferrari ride. It does not end well for him.

“Dress for the job you want, not the one you have,” they say. “Dress like a sickly Byronic vampire and reap the consequences,” we say.

Poe’s original story “Never Bet the Devil Your Head” is a hilariously passive aggressive response to his critics who accused him (and/or his tales) of lacking morals. So he wrote the most blatantly moral tale he could come up with. It is definitely worth reading if you have not – the tone is hilarious. However, it may not be the easiest story to make into an interesting film, so Fellini’s decision to basically keep only the ending and a slightly morally dubious protagonist is an understandable one. And as stated, this entry was our favourite, despite us being Poe-purists at heart.

“Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night” What a legend!

While the three shorts have varying degrees of connection with the source material, they have all definitely tried to sex it up quite a bit. Poe wasn’t really known for his spicy content – he was more about the implied incest and necrophelia than explicit sexual stuff. So, much more pure. In Vadim’s “Metzengerstein,” the young count Frederic has become sexy Frédérique, and the old neighbour Berlifitzing has become young, alluring, and a cousin to boot. So at least Poe’s incest motif has been honoured, we guess. William Wilson, while always an unlikable character has, in Malle’s version, become a sexual sadist in addition to your ordinary, run-of-the-mill everyday sadist from the short story.

Admittedly, it’s been a while since we read “Metzengerstein.” It is entirely possible that Frederic wore this exact outfit in the story and the adaptation is true to its source material.

We loved the costumes, Terence Stamp, Jane Fonda, the Devil, the stressful Ferrari ride, the Catholic Western that Toby’s set to star in (complete with cowboy Jesus and all), the award ceremony and basically everything about Fellini’s entry. We also enjoyed the fact that these filmmakers have chosen relatively unknown Poe tales to adapt (at least, lesser known compared to “the big ones”). This may of course be related to the fact that there were supposed to be more directors and stories filmed for the series, but one by one they all dropped out, leaving the three we have today. While the project may not have reached the heights originally envisioned, the ones that were completed are definitely worth a watch, and the film is a perfect choice for Halloween (which, as you all know, is celebrated from October 1st through (at least) November 30th).

I believe we just found this year’s costume

What we learned: Dammit, Toby! Also, if you stand by and do nothing, or participate in the slightest, when people are trying to rape or kill, you’re as culpable as the perp. Do better!

MVP: Terence Stamp. And Edgar himself, obvi.

Next time: The Boston Strangler (1968)

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#366 Pretty Poison

Watched: September 26 2025

Director: Noel Black

Starring: Anthony Perkins, Tuesday Weld, Beverly Garland, John Randolph, Dick O’Neill, Clarice Blackburn

Year: 1968

Runtime: 1h 29min

Dennis Pitt (Perkins) is released from the psych ward where he has been treated for “dangerous fantasies.” Foreshadowing, thy name be… well, “delusional fantasies,” apparently. Deemed ready to rejoin society as a productive member, he promptly starts his new life by creeping on a high school drill team, specifically 17-year-old Sue Ann Stepanek (Weld).

The title sequence really should have been our first hint that this will not go the way it initially seems. Mea culpa.

He eventually plucks up the courage to approach her, but not as himself. Oh no, under the guise of being a secret agent – one in need of an assistant on his top secret, not at all fake mission – he tricks her into joining him to expose the environmenal crimes of the factory where he (actually) works. However, he may have bitten over more than he can chew with innocent high schooler Sue Ann.

“You work for the CIA but they do not provide you with a car, any equipment or a partner for what you say is a two person job? That does not sound suspicious at all. Hopefully, neither is my eagerness to join forces with you.”

We went in blind on this one, and we definitely recommend it – this was a wild ride from start to finish. In fact, you may want to watch it before reading this review… Pretty Poison is less well known than several other dark comedies from the era (at least to our knowledge), and it deserves a wider audience. Perkins is disturbingly good at being innocent and creepy at the same time, a perfect Dennis, and Weld is charming, chilling and chaotic as Sue Ann.

Additional shoutout to Perkins’ ability to look simultaneously 20 and 40 years old. We have absolutely no clue how old his character is supposed to be…

To us, it’s unclear how much of his fantasies and lies Dennis actually believes, and how much is just a way to manipulate a high school girl into a relationship with him. Whether or not he believes his own fantasies, we cannot escape the fact that he drugs and rapes Sue Ann, and then convinces his case officer to let him stay after breaking his parole because “he’s in love.” With a child. And that is apparently a good thing. What a world.

“I know I skipped our weekly meeting and moved away, thus breaking the conditions of my release, but you see I have met and fallen in love with a teenager, who I have convinced that I am a secret agent in dire need of help on my mission, help only a high school girl can provide mind you, and I have even tricked her into sleeping with me and I think I’m in love and you know that love is the great cure-all, so I clearly will not be a threat to society anymore!” “Well, why didn’t you say so? Go on and enjoy your life, my lad! I see no red flags here.”

Despite the sinister nature of Dennis’ manipulations and actions (regardless of his intentions and possible delusions – his reactions towards the end make us lean towards him being a manipulator and complusive liar rather than a mentally ill man who actually believes his own stories), things are not quite what they seem, and the twists and shifts in power dynamics make this a movie worth watching. The increasingly atonal march that keeps playing throughout the movie is a great illustration of Dennis’ breaking psyche, and we loved both their performances, Sue Ann’s car, Dennis’ landlady Mrs Bronson (Blackburn), and the dark humour which occasionally made us laugh out loud. Overall, a great watch.

Dennis is about to learn a lesson for the ages: nothing is scarier or more dangerous than teenage girls. This goes double for the pretty and popular ones…

What we learned: Don’t be fooled by a pretty face. Or a clearly fake cover story of spies and secret agents… And for god’s sake – don’t let your unstable, delusional ex-patients break all the rules of their parole because they enter a relationship with a minor! That is not a good sign!

MVP: Mrs Bronson. We just enjoyed her whole vibe. Or Sue Ann. What a ride!

Next time: Rosemary’s Baby (1968)

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#354 If….

Watched: February 2 2023

Director: Lindsay Anderson

Starring: Malcolm McDowell, David Wood, Richard Warwick, Christine Noonan, Anthony Nicholls, Peter Jeffrey

Year: 1968

Runtime: 1h 51min

College House – a fucked up, disciplinarian boarding school (is there any other kind?). Among its students: Mick Travis. You know the type – the sort of guy whose brand of insolence and defiance is so ingrained in him you just cannot beat it out. Yes, we love him too. But that sort of attitude and his refusal to conform aren’t acceptable in polite society, so he must be cut down. And believe us, they try.

If you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine

In If…, we are treated to a slice of normal British boarding school life: bullying, beatings, rape, truancy, less than engaged teachers and a strict hierarchy which is often abused. Being Norwegian, female, and ridiculously middle class, we have no idea how realistic this (insane) depiction is, but from what we’ve read and seen in other places, we fear it might be pretty accurate. As for plot, we don’t want to give too much away as we think everyone should see this for themselves. Suffice to say, Mick reaches his breaking point and shit goes off.

Chekhov would be very proud to be taken so literally!

As you may have inferred from the previous paragraph, we loved this! Malcolm McDowell is hypnotic as Mick – his impertinence spews from his very pores, and we loved him in this role. This is not your normal teenage rebellion, he embodies it as a deep-rooted character trait that can’t be eradicated through corporal punishment – the second the prefects confront him and try to make him conform, they’ve lost the battle.

“♫♬ Tell me why! Ain’t nothing but a beat down. Ain’t nothing but a spanking. (Tell me why) I never wanna hear you say “I want some basic respect and human dignity and to be treated as a person in this place” because that’s not how the Empire was built!”

Also, can we talk about all male (or all-any-gender) boarding schools? What the actual fuck? Obviously, these schools have played a crucial role in fostering a culture where men don’t see women as human beings (when you never interact with them as equals, how would you?), where bullying and violence mean “building character,” where authority is absolute, and where non-conformity = death. And personally, we rather object to such a culture.

It’s the sort of culture which fosters this. And the fact that we all have the same interpretation of this image is very sad…

We loved the psycho romance with the waitress (how much of that actually happened? We’re guessing very little), the incredibly unengaged history teacher (if teaching was like this we would never think about leaving the profession), the slow build-up, the violent conclusion, and of course the magnetic Malcolm McDowell – He of the Intense EyesTM. Also the random guy who showed up at the end in full medieval armour. Honestly, we wouldn’t be surprised if this was normal ceremonial attire in the formal public school setting, but we like to imagine he just woke up that day feeling a bit medieval and decided to go for it. Overall, this is definitely a movie we will recommend to others, and one we won’t easily forget.

“He’ll have the coffee, black, and I’ll take the animalistic sexgames. With milk.”

Side note: we spent a great deal of time trying to analyse why parts of the movie were in colour and parts in monochrome. We had many theories (conformity vs. non-conformity, reality vs. fantasy, etc.) although we struggled to see the connection between them. Then, once we finally gave up and googled it, we found out that it was just because the natural light they had to use in some scenes would mess with the colour quality and thus monochrome was used… Conclusion: not everything is symbolism.

What we learned: Education in Britain is like a nubile Cinderella: sparsely clad and much interfered with.

Next time: Night of the Living Dead (1968)

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#352 Dark of the Sun

Watched: January 9 2023

Director: Jack Cardiff

Starring: Rod Taylor, Yvette Mimieux, Jim Brown, Peter Carsten, Kenneth More, André Morell

Year: 1968

Runtime: 1h 40min

In war-torn Congo, Captain Curry and his trusted partner in crime Ruffo take on a dangerous new mission: to travel through areas of civil and military unrest to retrieve a bunch of diamonds for the new president. And what does a mission of this magnitude need? A crack team! And a mid-sized military squadron. Or battalion. Brigade? Division? Regiment? We’re not down with the lingo – we never joined the army despite our sharp wits and even sharper bayonets (a weapon much favoured among modern military forces, we’re sure). Anyway – Mercenaries Assemble!

“You know I’ll only go if there’s a guarantee that I can shoot stuff with a big-ass gun from a vehicle that’s on fire, right?” “Guaranteed!” “You son of a bitch, I’m in!”

Their band of mercenaries (and one nazi) ready themselves for the adventure of a lifetime! Well, not technically a lifetime seeing as how they’re all soldiers who have been fighting in Congo for a while. More like they ready themselves for another day’s work. Either way, ready they are and off they go!

And you thought we meant nazi in the figurative way…

Along the way they run into flying attacks, a damsel in distress (who was coming along anyway, but still), child murder, chainsaw fights, inconvenient time locks, Simbas, child birth, nuns and train delays. There’s also love and betrayal, and surprisingly emotional deaths.

And, of course, a sprinkle of romance between the (anti-)hero and the only female character

Dark of the Sun (a.k.a. The Mercenaries, a.k.a. Planes, Trains and Armored Jeeps, a.k.a. Bromance – The Movie) is exciting, emotional, violent and very, very good, and we absolutely loved it! Curry might be in a gray area morally, but he firmly places himself on the right side of history, calling out racists and literal nazis throughout the movie. Also, can we talk about Curry and Ruffo? Now that is a friendship for the ages! The whole romantic thing with Claire means nothing in comparison – Curry and Ruffo is the real romance here. Also, that final fight between Curry and Nazi-boy felt incredibly brutal and real. Overall, two very enthusiastic thumbs up from Norway!

“You know she’s just a beard, right..?”

What we learned: Diamonds are a man’s worst enemy. Also, don’t bring a nazi on your mission. Or anywhere really.

Next time: Head (1968)

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#304 2001: A Space Odyssey

Watched: January 12 2022 during our first ever 1000 Films Blog Movie Night™

Director: Stanley Kubrick

Starring: Keir Dullea, Gary Lockwood, William Sylvester, Daniel Richter, Leonard Rossiter, Margaret Tyzack, Robert Beatty, Sean Sullivan, Douglas Rain, Frank Miller

Year: 1968

Runtime: 2h 29min

Source

Ok, let’s face it, we cannot possibly hope to say anything new and interesting about one of the world’s most celebrated pieces of cinema – Stanley Kubrick’s masterpiece 2001: A Space Odyssey. So we’re not even going to try, but we will give a brief summary of the plot for the three readers who have never seen the movie.

Meet Ralph
Ralph might be seeing red, but in fact he is very happy today
You know why? Ralph just landed his dream job! He is going to be an astronaut!
With his trusty sidekicks D’raak and Susan, Ralph will travel the universe looking for The Lost Oyster Pearl of Quan-exa’peh™
Along the way, the intrepid trio will stumble onto many a curious adventure, such as beekeeping on Jupiter and fighting the dream-giraffes of Sckraaaaaaaa. They also find themselves in an award-winning heavy metal band supporting a world class primate drummer.
At one point they even get lost in the Windows Media Player. Classic Ralph!
But will he eventually wake up to find that it was all just a dream..? Only one way to find out! Get yourself a copy of 2001: The Space Odyssey of Ralph, D’raak and Susan – out on LaserDisc now!
There are so many reasons why this film has become such a classic – foremost of which is Kubrick’s decision to film everything with the camera lying on its side. Amazing.

What we learned: In space, no one can hear you have an existential crisis.

Next time: Barbarella (1968)

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#303 Weekend

Watched: January 30 2021 …and then again on January 3 2022 since we’d forgotten the experience.

Director: Jean-Luc Godard

Starring: Mireille Darc, Jean Yanne, and a whole bunch of other people

Year: 1967

Runtime: 1h 45min

Source

How can we describe Weekend? It’s definitely a film you should experience for yourself, but we’ll take a shot at describing the plot.

Basically, it’s sort of like this, but with long tracking shots, musical interludes and political speeches.

Roland (Yanne) and Corinne (Darc) are planning to kill her parents for the inheritance, as one does. Then, he plots to off her for the same reason, since he has another girl waiting in the wings. Lovely couple, very nice.

You won’t BELIEVE how they ended up in this state! Read on for all the gruesome details!

After describing a sexual encounter in detail (though without any emotion), as we all always do with your partners, Corinne gets in the car with Roland and off they go a-killing. They soon run into major traffic, as well as an impressive and very long shot of them passing said traffic in the wrong lane. With honking. Lots of honking. And some dead bodies casually strewn around.

♫ We’re all going on a – murder holiday ♬♪

Eventually the two crash their car (it was inevitable, really) and go on foot instead, running into historical and fictional characters, cannibals, and rapists. You know, the sort of people who tend to hang out in your local woods.

Sadly, when we went lurking about in the woods in our feather boas and fancy medallions, we learned that our local cannibalistic forest-lurkers lacked this kind of flair. Very disappointed. And just a little bit scared.

Somehow it all works, thanks to Godard’s genius. In a way, we feel as though it’s designed to stress you out. It’s a commentary on consumerism, classicism, racism, egotism and general shittyness. You kind of have to see it to believe it, and while Weekend doesn’t seem to be streaming anywhere, a good library will probably have a copy. This is why we love physical media and public libraries.

Hear ye, hear ye: get thee to a library and fetch thee an obscure DVD.

Weekend is funny and silly and brutal and disturbing, but most of all it’s fascinating. Sure, it’s not a movie everyone will love, but we enjoyed this roadtrip from Hell quite a lot, even though we didn’t quite understand the world we were thrown into. To be fair, we feel that way just waking up in the morning, so it might be us…

Sometimes, you just feel like a lonely drummer by a lake, you know?

What we learned: We’re going to need diagrams of the sex scene Corinne describes. How did that work physically?? If anyone can do a powerpoint presentation, an illustration, a demonstration or something of the mechanicals of it, please let us know.

Next time: 2001: A Space Odyssey (1968)

Posted on by 1000filmsblog

#302 Two for the Road

Watched: December 21 2021

Director: Stanley Donen

Starring: Audrey Hepburn, Albert Finney, Eleanor Bron, William Daniels, Claude Dauphin, Nadia Gray, Georges Descrières, Jacqueline Bisset, Judy Cornwell

Year: 1967

Runtime: 1h 51min

Source

Joanna and Mark Wallace (Hepburn and Finney, respectively), a disillusioned and sniping couple, are going on a road trip to St. Tropez. The story of their 12 year relationship is told through flashbacks juxtaposed with more current events as we examine how they ended up in their current, seemingly loveless, marriage.

As our mama always said: make sure the cute girl you meet while hitchhiking through continental Europe and then decide to marry, isn’t a bug-eyed alien in disguise. Those marriages never work out. Well, maybe once or twice.

Travel permeates their relationship – at least most critical events appear to have happened while they’re on the road. They met in Europe and fell in love while hitchhiking together, and from there on out most developments occur on other trips they take, alone or together.

All the while breaking down the barriers of fashion and good taste with their de rigeur headgear

Our favourite might be their ridiculous road trip with Mark’s ex Cathy (Bron), her overbearing husband Howard (Daniels) and their obnoxious and unruly daughter Ruthie (not her fault – her parents are useless). The fact that Joanna and Mark have kids after this is mindblowing.

“So, according to this, it’s too late for an abortion when the child is already walking and talking.” “You sure? There’s no small print..?”

We’re in two minds about this movie. We love the non-linear storytelling and the wardrobe, but the relationship doesn’t quite work for us. Audrey Hepburn is lovely as Joanna, but frankly we’re not sold on Albert Finney in this, and we don’t quite see their chemistry.

Might be us though – there’s a chance we’re blinded by the wardrobe

At times it seems as though they’re going for the loving bickering of Nick and Nora, but while she is charming enough, he often comes across as a douche. Why on earth would they get married? They’re a perfect example of how squabbling and negging does NOT a cute couple make.

Just keep on walking, girl. Never mind the chafing from your highly impractical ensemble which you inexplicably chose for a long road trip in a warm car.

Sure, they have some good times – their express tourism is fun, and the continuous gag about his passport is cute, but overall our impression is that they should have been a holiday fling. Not building a life together. Especially as they fall into the classic trap of “sure, my partner and I have agreed on a life goal together, but I’m sure they’ll change their mind now that I have!” Then again, maybe that is the point of the story..? In which case: well done to all involved!

“Do you ever get the feeling that all our vehicles always falling apart is some sort of metaphor..?”

We have a fondness for Cathy though – just the way she talks is enough to make us want to hang out with her. And we’d pay good money to see a crossover show with Cathy and Howie befriending Mortitia and Gomez Addams! Or Nick and Nora Charles. If anyone wants to develop that show we’ll take 10% of all proceeds, including merchandising, please and thank you.

What we learned: Who travels in a vinyl outfit? Have fun with the thrush…

Next time: Weekend (1967)