#61 To Be Or Not To Be

Watched: November 27 2016

Director: Ernst Lubitsch

Starring: Carole Lombard, Jack Benny, Robert Stack, Stanley Ridges

Year: 1942

Runtime: 1h 39min

Note: same at Cat People and Road to Morocco. Starting to have abandonment issues.

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During World War II, Joseph (Benny) and Maria Tura (Lombard) are the lead actors in a Polish theatre troupe in Warsaw. While Joseph is onstage, however, his wife has an unfortunate tendency to flirt with young men in her dressing room. Before the German occupation of Poland, these young men included lieutenant Sobinski (Stack), who fled to join the RAF once Poland was occupied.

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Maria’s affair hurts Joseph in several ways. First because of her unfaithfulness, second because her lover keeps leaving the theatre during his most important soliloquy – “To be or not to be”

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In England, Sobinski starts to suspect professor Siletsky (Ridges) who’s returning to Warsaw, of being a spy for Germany. Once the higher-ups learn that the professor is going to Poland with the names and addresses of all the relatives of the Polish flyboys, they send Sobinski to intercept him and the information to prevent it from falling into the wrong hands.

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No man with a beard as glorious as this could ever be a spy?!?

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Maria, Joseph, and eventually the entire troupe are dragged into the plot to secure the information and after Siletsky is accidentally killed, Joseph has to impersonate the dead spy in meetings with the (somewhat incompetent) Nazi leaders. With hilarious consequences.

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To Maria’s acting credit, she improvises like a champ upon realising that the man she’s been flirting with for info is now played by her husband

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Although we’ve both heard of this classic comedy before, we had yet to watch it. Despite Sister the Oldest having at one point watched pretty much everything related to Hamlet ever made, for a University course, this one had slipped through the net. So it was about time.

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Seriously – I know the entire soliloquy. Yet have never once been paid to recite it.

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To Be or Not to Be is hilarious and impressive, made even more so considering it was made in 1942, with the war still going strong though the full extent of the atrocities of Nazi Germany were not yet public knowledge. Making fun of Hitler and the Nazis in general was a brave move at the time, but it is not hard to discern the motivation of Jewish German-born director Lubitsch. Despite being a comedy, and a great one at that, the film naturally has very serious undertones and the threat of the Nazi regime is palpable throughout. Definitely worth watching!

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Aw, silly Hitler!

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What we learned: a tendency to dragging out scenes and stealing the spotlight makes professional actors unsuited for undercover work.

Next time: I Walked with a Zombie (1943)

#60 Road to Morocco

Watched: November 27 2016

Director: David Butler

Starring: Bing Crosby, Bob Hope, Dorothy Lamour, Dona Drake, Anthony Quinn

Year: 1942

Runtime: 1h 22min

Note: see note for Cat People. Yup, she was still gone.

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After their ship blows up, two stowaways find themselves on a raft discussing who will eat who first. Luckily, before it comes down to that, they find land and a very friendly camel to take them to Morocco. Yay camels!

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You haven’t lived until you’ve sung a song on the back of a camel. Fact!

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They arrive in a very Arabian Nights-inspired Morocco, complete with princess in distress and violent locals, where they get  up to all sorts of zany antics including, but not limited to, selling each other into slavery. Ah – men, am I right?

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At least, this particular form of slavery consisted of courting a beautiful princess. As far as human trafficking is concerned, it could be a lot worse.

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Once Jeffrey (Crosby) finds out the exact nature of the work he sold Orville’s (Hope) into, he inserts himself into the lives of the newly engaged couple to try to win princess Shalmar (Lamour) for himself. And he succeeds. Which is just as well, as Orville seems more interested in her handmaiden Mihirmah (Drake) anyway.

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Can’t imagine why

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Now, this is when things get really complicated for the two old friends. It turns out the princess is only interested in marrying Orville because a prophecy has foretold that her first husband will die after only a week of marriage, and she is really engaged to a local sheikh, Kasim (Quinn). However, the sheikh cannot compete with the natural charm and musical talents of Bing Crosby, and the princess decides to go with the penniless American instead. The sheikh does not take kindly…

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He doesn’t take kindly at all!

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He kidnaps the princess and her entourage, and leaves Jeff and Orville to die in the desert. It’s up to them to rescue their loves and save the day!

Road to Morocco is very silly, quite raunchy at times, and it breaks the fourth wall masterfully. There’s dancing, action, romance, and cool costumes as well as sometimes sweet, sometimes fun, musical numbers. A great hangover film for early Sunday afternoon. Or Tuesday morning. Whatever rubs your Buddha.

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We all know what he will be rubbing. Ooo – naughty!

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What we learned: make sure your telescope is clean before making life or death prophecies.

Next time: To Be or Not To Be (1942)

#59 Cat People

Watched: November 27 2016

Director: Jacques Tourneur

Starring: Simone Simon, Kent Smith, Tom Conway, Jane Randolph

Year: 1942

Runtime: 1h 13min

Note: Cat People was watched only by Sister the Oldest, as Sister the Youngest had once again fucked off to Oslo, this time to do exams. How very selfish of her, trying to get an education when there are films to be watched.

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Irina Dubrovna (Simon) is a Serbian fashion sketch artist working on ideas in a New York zoo when she strikes up a conversation with Oliver Reed (Smith – not actor Oliver Reed). They fall in love and get married despite Irina’s conviction that she is a descendant of a coven of devil worshipping witches who turn into cats when aroused or angry.

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“We cannot consummate our marriage. Or kiss. And you shouldn’t make me angry. But other than that, we’ll have a perfectly ordinary marriage, I’m sure!”

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Now, in Irina’s defence, this is not a condition she wants, but she believes the superstitions of her Serbian village and does not want to risk hurting herself or her husband. She agrees to go to therapy to help save her marriage, but it does not do much to help her, especially since her therapist’s idea of a cure is kissing his patient. Very unhippocratic.

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“It’s a new kind of therapy – all up to code and medically approved, I assure you. Now, take off your clothes.”

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To complicate their lives further, Reed’s colleague Alice Moore (Randolph) is in love with him, and since things aren’t going too well at home, he falls for her as well. Irina suspects an affair and gives in to her inner desires to stalk and prey on Alice, who does indeed seem to be followed by a large cat.

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Even in the pool. How rude!

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As the plot thickens, Oliver and Alice keep treating Irina as a child in one instance, a mentally unstable woman in the next, and then as a dangerous threat. It’s no wonder she becomes a bit unhinged and wants revenge on them for shutting her out and starting an affair. There’s nothing inherently bad about her, but she is never taken seriously or treated as an equal by her husband which causes her to snap.

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And what better way to plot vengeance than in a deserted, foggy New York street

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It’s never really clear whether Irina is right or not. She certainly seems to think she turns into a large, predatory cat when angry, upset or turned on, and Alice and Oliver are eventually convinced as well. The ambiguity is one of the main strengths of the film though, and not having clear answers makes it more intriguing than a straight-forward horror film about a shapeshifting woman. What comes across clearly however, is that no one really thinks of Irina as a grown, independent woman – even her therapy sessions consist of her being put in a trance so she has no memory of what she tells her doctor. Despite the fact that she moved to the USA alone and made a career for herself before meeting her husband, everyone seems to think she’s too fragile to be treated like an adult. Probably due to the fact that (they think) she believes in fairy tales, but still.

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We suppose when you marry a cat woman you’re either looking for a pet or a sex kitten. And when she won’t conform to either – well, it’s time to cut her loose.

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Now, I might be reading a bit much into this (I blame my literature background), but it’s hard not to get analytical about this film. What I’m trying to say is that I loved Cat People and I am looking forward to more Tourneur. Which is coming up very soon in I Walked with a Zombie. Yay!

What we learned: don’t have an affair with a man whose wife might be a murderous shapeshifter. Also, don’t treat your wife as a child.

Next time: Road to Morocco (1942)

#58 The Maltese Falcon

Watched: November 04 2016

Director: John Huston

Starring: Humphrey Bogart, Mary Astor, Peter Lorre, Gladys George, Jerome Cowan, Lee Patrick, Sydney Greenstreet

Year: 1941

Runtime: 1h 40min

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Samuel Spade (Bogart) is a San Francisco P.I. working with partner Miles Archer (Cowan). One day, a dame (Astor) walks into their office. And what a dame. Legs up to here and an air of desperation about her. Just the way Spade likes’em.

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Desperation and a stole. Spade smells an easy payday.

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Now, this dame is looking for her missing sister, and she knows the lowlife who has her. She pays up for a stakeout and Archer, whose wife Spade is incidentally screwing, ends up dead on the job. Spade has a fairly laissez-faire attitude about the whole thing and proceeds to remove Archer’s name from the company window and door. He is nothing if not efficient and practical.

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The whole brooding private detective thing works better as a solo act anyway

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Of course, the dame isn’t telling the truth. She’s lied about her name, her intentions, and the identity of the man she wanted located. In fact, she’s caught up in an international conspiracy involving a golden falcon artefact, more than a few shady characters and several murders. It’s not long before Spade has a new visitor – Joel Cairo (Lorre) who tries to get the jump on the P.I. But one does not simply walk into Spade’s office and threaten him. Or, if one does, one leaves with one’s tail between one’s legs. Or in a body bag. Luckily for Cairo, the former is the option Spade goes with. This time.

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He’ll take you out without even dropping his smoke

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Once Spade is properly roped in, the dame, whose real name is possibly Brigid O’Shaughnessy, although she goes by several pseudonyms, drops her act and comes clean. More or less. Meanwhile, Spade has his own fun, pitting the various bad guys against each other and playing on their greed to manipulate them.

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“You know you need to sacrifice your little pet here, right?”

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The Maltese Falcon is a classic for very good reasons. It’s a wild ride from start to finish and Bogart is amazing in it, as are the others, but he really steals the show (along with his secretary Effie (Patrick), who we also loved). Spade is cynical and tough, but he also has a lot of fun and seems to enjoy his work and the challenges his opponents throw at him. Despite his methods (and his relationship with his partner’s wife) he has his own moral compass, and not even a desperate dame can make him stray from his convictions.

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All this drama for a statuette. Foreigners!

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Love this one – can’t wait for more noir!

What we learned: don’t get caught up in a drama revolving around a figurine. Also, never try to make a detective into a criminal.

Next time: Cat People (1942)

#57 Suspicion

Watched: October 28 2016

Director: Alfred Hitchcock

Starring: Cary Grant, Joan Fontaine, Nigel Bruce, Sir Cedric Hardwicke, Dame May Whitty, Auriol Lee

Year: 1941

Runtime: 1h 39min

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Shy, bookish introvert Lina (Fontaine) keeps running into charming (but creepy) playboy Johnnie (Grant). After parrying his first advances, she overhears her parents discussing her inevitable descent into spinsterhood and starts pursuing him instead. She rapidly goes from indifferent and interesting to lovesick and stalkery, all in the name of avoiding becoming a spinster.

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“I’d better marry the man who assaulted me on our first date. The alternative is just too horrible!”

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Back from their honeymoon, she realises he’s completely broke, living well above his means, and intends to live off of her income and future inheritance. Being a sensible woman (apart from marrying this guy) she suggests he gets a job. So he sells her family heirlooms to gamble instead.

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“Do you mean to say you love these chairs that have been in your family for generations and which your father gave us? Well, if I had known that I never would have sold them, monkey face!”

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Lina also starts to suspect her handsome, charming husband may have murderous intents, especially when his rich friend Beaky (Bruce) dies in a freak accident in France while Johnnie is out of town. It doesn’t help his case that he asks a lot of questions about untraceable poisons to Lina’s crime writer friend Isobel Sedbusk (Lee) and then starts feeding Lina suspicious drinks.

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“Just trying to be a good husband. God, I can’t do anything right, can I?”

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Suspicion is as suspenseful mystery from the king of the genre, Mr Alfred Hitchcock, and it is fun to see Cary Grant play a villainous character. Joan Fontaine is great as well and actually won an Oscar for her portrayal of the confused, helpless and scared Lina. The film has a great soundtrack and sound effects, and normal, everyday actions, such as carving a chicken at a dinner party, turn very dark and menacing due to the extreme tension throughout. Lina gradually covers up her neck (Johnnie’s favourite part of her body) as her suspicions grow, and the lighting in the film perfectly illustrates her state of mind (like some filmatic mood ring).

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The use of light and shadow is amazing in general – not just as Lina’s mood ring

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Despite the abrupt and slightly unsatisfactory ending, this is a great, tense mystery film. We loved the ’40s fashion as well – it is nigh impossible to look bad in those clothes.

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The typical “nerd attire” in the 1940s is particularly good, especially compared to its more modern counterparts

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What we learned: never marry a man who calls you “monkey face.”

Next time: The Maltese Falcon (1941)

#56 Sullivan’s Travels

Watched: November 04 2016

Director: Preston Sturges

Starring: Veronica Lake, Joel McCrea

Year: 1941

Runtime: 1h 30min

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John L. Sullivan (McCrea) wants to make a serious film with real social issues and deep meaning (with a little sex in it) which will educate his audience and make them think about the social and economic structures in place in 1940s USA. The only problem is, he’s a pampered Hollywood director who’s never really experienced any of these problems himself. Also, his producers would rather have him make silly comedies and fun action flicks (with a little sex in them).

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“Let’s face it, you can make whatever you want as long as there’s a little sex in it”

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Naturally, he decides to go undercover as a hobo to experience firsthand the suffering of the penniless, with nothing but ten cents (or something like that), the clothes on his back and a crew of five or six reporters, producers and chefs following him in a bus.

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“What do you mean, some people go on the road without the expert advice of costume designers? Then how do they achieve that ‘poor, penniless hobo’-look?”

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His first venture is somewhat fruitless. Although he hilariously manages to shake his entourage with the help of a little boy in a “whippet tank” and then convinces them to take a vacation in Las Vegas, he doesn’t do too well on his own and is eventually kidnapped by a sexually frustrated woman. After escaping through the window he finds a diner where a failed actress (Lake) buys him breakfast and he then “borrows” his own car to give her a ride home.

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There’s just no way any cop would ever pull over a tramp driving an expensive car

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The Girl (who needs a name anyway?) finds out his true identity and decides to join his experiment, dressed (rather unconvincingly) as a boy. Together they go on fun hobo adventures!

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Turns out dressing like a hobo isn’t really enough to fool actual hobos.

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More problems ensue and after a stint in prison Sullivan realises that comedies aren’t really that bad after all and that serious films with real social issues are actually more interesting to the people not experiencing these issues themselves than the ones living them.

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Just like living the hobo life seems more romantic to people not forced into that position

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It’s pretty much impossible to explain how funny this film is. We loved the fast, snappy dialogue, the long, silent Chaplinesque scenes, the wonderful bass voice of the minister who invites the prisoners to movie night in his church, and the satirical view of 1940s Hollywood (and U.S. society in general). This was also our first Veronica Lake (we know – for shame!) and we have now developed major girl crushes on her. Not only is she gorgeous, but she has a very particular presence which is completely fascinating.

Give Sullivan’s Travels a chance. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, it’ll change your life!

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Even as a hobo, Veronica Lake is gorgeous.

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What we learned: if we know what we want, we’ll never live in Pittsburgh. Also, the value of escapism in films is not to be underestimated.

Next time: Suspicion (1941)

#55 Dumbo

Watched: October 30 2016

Director: Wilfred Jackson, Ben Sharpsteen, Jack Kinney, Sam Armstrong, Norman Ferguson, Bill Roberts, John Elliotte

Starring: Edward Brophy, Verna Felton, loads and loads of other voice actors

Year: 1941

Runtime: 1h 4min

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Poor Mrs Jumbo. She’s the only animal in the circus who’s not visited by the stork, and she’s very sad about it. But wait! The stork was only delayed due to its heavy burden. Hooray! But wait again! What’s going on? Is the elephant baby a freak? The other elephants certainly seem to think so on account of his massive ears. But Mrs Jumbo (where’s Mr Jumbo..?) disagrees – she thinks her child is beautiful and perfect. Thus goes the emotional roller coaster ride which is the opening of Dumbo.

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This may seem blissful now, but just you wait for the trauma that is about to come…

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Mrs Jumbo, fiercely protective of her son, is labelled insane (or, being female, probably hysterical) by the circus owners after attacking some kids who made fun of Dumbo, and she’s sent to solitary confinement, leaving the young infant to fend for himself as the other (very elitist) elephants will have nothing to do with the freak.

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Bitchy, gossipy elephants: many an innocent child’s first exposure to bullying

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Luckily for Dumbo, Timothy Q. Mouse, a mouse(!), takes pity on him and becomes his mentor/manager, trying to get him a good position in the circus show. Which doesn’t go so well. However, after a drunken night complete with pink, dancing elephants, the two (along with some very culturally insensitive, but historically interesting, crows) discover Dumbo’s secret power – his enormous ears are perfect for flying, and they become the salvation of both Dumbo and Mrs Jumbo. Yay!

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Though technically, those ears should have been the death of them all, so science tells us…

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Despite the traumatizing event of Mrs Jumbo being sent to solitary, this is a sweet film about learning to accept your faults, and finding that what makes you weird may also be your biggest asset. We love the “Pink Elephants on Parade” scene (which made us wonder just how many drugs were involved in making this film, and in which quantities) as well as the way Dumbo holds on to the mouse’s tail and follows him around when his mother is no longer around. Perfect Sunday viewing, especially if you have children (or if you can borrow one as an alibi..).

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“You’re my mommy now!”

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What we learned: look out for Mr Stork! Seriously – avoid that bastard.

Next time: Sullivan’s Travels (1941)

#54 Citizen Kane

Watched: October 22 2016

Director: Orson Welles

Starring: Orson Welles & the Mercury Actors

Year: 1941

Runtime: 1h 59min

Note: only Sister the Oldest watched this, as Sister the Youngest had fucked off to Oslo. Incidentally, she timed her trip so that she would avoid watching Citizen Kane… And unlike The Bank Dick, whose title no one could resist, Sister the Oldest couldn’t find anyone interested in watching this classic drama with her, so it was just her, a bottle of wine, and Orson Welles. She had a blast!

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It was terrific!

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We suppose no one really needs a recap of this classic, as it is generally considered the greatest film of all time. Still, we’ll give you a short summary. A rich, narcissistic publishing tycoon, Charles Foster Kane (Welles), dies alone in his vast mansion, and for some reason everyone knows his last word, “Rosebud,” even though he was clearly alone when he died.

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Our theory is he was overheard by a chatty ghost, as this place is clearly haunted!

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A journalist working on a newsreel of the magnate’s life (which was in no way based on real people, by the way! No siree, not at all!) sets out to find the meaning of Kane’s last word, and interviews old associates, friends and an ex-wife to try and get to the bottom of the mystery. He fails in that particular quest, but what he does find is a sad boy with abandonment issues and a slight case of megalomania. As for “Rosebud,” the audience are given the answer at the end of the film.

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Hint: it’s pictured here, and it is not wearing a top hat. #spoileralert

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I have to level with you, and admit that we were not looking forward to this. We both watched it in school when we were about 16 or 17, and found it incredibly boring, which is why S.t.Y. decided to skip town rather than rewatch it. I, S.t.O., wasn’t really excited either (while interested in film at 17, I was more into the Jackson and Raimi cult horror stuff than the Welles classics kind), but I have clearly matured a bit since 17 (thank God!) and this time around, I loved it.

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It even has a dance number! More than enough to keep me entertained.

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It had me from the Gothic opening and I was enthralled throughout. The story, the shots, the camera angles, the non-linear storytelling, not to mention the increasingly unlikable Kane, all come together to make a great film. One could spend hours (and paragraphs) analysing and commenting on the technical and artistic brilliance of Citizen Kane, but that has been done several times by people better qualified than me, so I shan’t even attempt it. I’ll just tell you this: if you were forced to watch it at a young age and didn’t like it, wait until you’re older and rewatch it. You won’t be sorry.

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I’d also like to point out that Welles was only 26 when Citizen Kane was released. Just to add to any inferiority complex you might have.

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What we learned: no matter how good your intentions, money and power corrupt.

Next time: Dumbo (1941)

#53 The Grapes of Wrath

Watched: October 29 2016

Director: John Ford

Starring: Henry Fonda, Jane Darwell, John Carradine, Charly Grapewin, Russell Simpson

Year: 1940

Runtime: 2h 9min

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The schizophrenic opening music perfectly sums up The Grapes of Wrath – it is in turns depressing and uplifting, and while a lot of bad things happen to the Joad family, there’s always hope and love. Sister the Oldest had read the Steinbeck novel before, but none of us had seen the film, possibly because we feared it would be too depressing. As it turned out – yes, it’s depressing, but we loved it nonetheless.

During the Great Depression, Oklahoma native Tom Joad (Fonda) is released from prison and hitchhikes back home only to find his family home deserted. He learns from former preacher Jim Casy (Carradine) and another local they come across that all families have been driven from their homes by the deed owners due to ruined crops. Tom eventually catches up with his family at his uncle’s place, and the Joads, along with Casy, start their arduous journey west, believing there’s work for them in California.

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Cue not-so-hilarious road trip!

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Along the way, they are faced with the deaths of two family members, xenophobic locals (“Okies” apparently ranked somewhere between Gypsies and rabid dogs back in the ’30s), cynical employers and corrupt police officers. However, they also meet with the occasional kindness, and the family members love each other and stick together, led by the wonderful Ma Joad (Darwell) who we absolutely adored.

 

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Pictured: a true American hero (and Oscar-winning performer)

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Tom’s experiences awaken his philosophical and political side, although it is former preacher Casy who becomes an activist and strike leader. However, when Tom tries to defend Casy from camp guards during an illegal strike meeting, he inadvertently kills the guard and becomes a liability for his family. He decides he has to go off on his own, but he waits until his family has found a safe place to stay (he is a good son after all).

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“But, who will lead the family if you go, Tom?” “Oh, come on, Ma. Don’t even pretend I’m the real leader here.”

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The dark side of the American Dream is evident in The Grapes of Wrath: if you’re poor, it’s somehow your own fault (you probably haven’t worked hard enough!) and so no one should feel sorry for you or help you out. The film is heartbreaking, sad, melancholy and occasionally infuriating. The Joads are loving and lovely though, and they give us a feeling of hope despite the bleak world they live in. The film is beautifully shot, and even the decrepit, dried-up land looks beautiful. Definitely worth watching!

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It is also very stylish and has a lot of cool shots, if that’s what rubs your Buddha

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What we learned: We’re sure glad business owner never exploit workers anymore in the USA (or anywhere else for that matter). And also that there’s no racism, xenophobia, generalisation of entire groups of people or anything like that anymore. Phew!

Next time: Citizen Kane (1941)

#52 The Bank Dick

Watched: October 21 2016

Director: Edward F. Cline

Starring: W.C. Fields, Cora Witherspoon, Una Merkel, Grady Sutton, Franklin Pangborn

Year: 1940

Runtime: 1h 12min

Note: since one sister (Sister the Youngest) fucked off to Oslo for a week, Sister the Oldest watched this one alone. Well, not alone, as she does have friends apart from her immediate family. So she watched it with a friend. Who’s real.

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Bumbling buffoon Egbert Sousé (Fields) drinks too much, has no career to speak of and his family does not respect him. So he goes out in search of a drink. On the way, he stumbles across a film team whose drunken director is unable to work and naturally they hire Sousé.

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Anyone capable of sitting on a chair shouting into a tube is automatically qualified to work as a director in 1940. Sadly, Sousé isn’t really able to do the former.

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After his short stint as director, Sousé finds himself in the vicinity of bank robbers trying to escape. He is credited with stopping them and so gets a job as a bank guard. His daughter’s fiancé Og Oggilby (Sutton) works in the same bank and after Sousé is offered the chance to invest in stock in a mining company, he persuades his future son-in-law to “borrow” $500 from the bank.

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“Of course it’s okay to borrow money from the bank! I’m head of security, aren’t I? Check out my trustworthy face!”

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Unfortunately, a bank examiner, J. Pinkerton Snoopington (Pangborn) shows up the very next day and Sousé and Oggilby must join wits (of which Og especially has very little) to keep the examiner to discover the missing $500. Let the farce commence!

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Rule number one when being investigated: take the investigator out for drinks and slip them a mickey.

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This is a very silly movie full of fucked up characters, over-the-top performances and slapstick humour. The main character is gullable, stupid and self-aggrandizing, yet he is also occasionally likeable, possibly because the way his family treats him makes you feel a bit sorry for him. But usually not for long, as he parries their attacks on him with attempted murder such as when he tries to throw a concrete vase at his youngest daughter.

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It’s practically as big as its intended target

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The real gem here though is the car chase towards the end of the film. It is fast, funny and impressive in so many ways – such as the very real danger in which it must have put stunt performers. Even if farcical slapstick films aren’t  your thing, it is well worth watching The Bank Dick for this scene alone. Or if you enjoy violence against 8-year-olds. And let’s face it – who doesn’t? Have fun!

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Naturally, no still can do a great chase scene justice, so you’ll just have to watch the film.

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What we learned: poor men are mad – rich men are eccentric. Also, it was surprisingly easy to get a job as a director back in the day.

Next time: The Grapes of Wrath (1940)